This is all correct. Most common culprit is low oil. Ensure you have the right amount of oil. The scraping sound is alarming. You could have an issue with your cams. If your oil level is good, and you don't see any signs of damage to the Vtec solenoid, you may want to bring it to a mechanic to have that checked out.not sure about the scraping sound. but in order for vtec to engage there are a few conditions to meet
check your oil to make sure its not low, if it is low you will not have the oil pressure needed for it to engage
also you must be at normal operating temp. if youre gunning it while cold it will not engage.
might be something else that im forgetting but those are the most common issues. you can also go to an auto parts store and have them check if its throwing any codes