special forces.. need your opinions

[boosted to 26ps]

so here's my dilemma.

I served in the army from 97 to 2001. went in under the delayed entry program. now that im reaching the cut off age shortly, im 30, I've been trying to make up my mind bout going back in. I had soooo much fun the first time around, an I've realized over the past few years, that if I would of stayed in I would of been able to retire in 7 more years. but the main thing that's different now is I have a 5 year old boy. this is where my issues come in... of what to do. do I go back in an do what I like to do.... or do I not go an spend my life here, but able to spend a lot of time with my boy, but working jobs I really don't like to do.

this decision has been aggravating me for the past couple of years now

 

[253eg]

If you liked it, why not? You're doing what you enjoyed, providing for your family, and being happier. Will you get your old rank back, which I'm assume was a Specialist, or will you drop a rank?

My dad did a similar thing as you, he never went back and I discovered the other week he regrets getting out. He loved the army, the life style. I'd go back in if I were in your shoes.

 

[Puma]

Well how often would you be able to see your son? I say go for it. You're already opening a lot of doors for your son just by serving.

My uncle made a career of it, as well as my grandfather(rip papa), 2 of my cousins are as well as my little brother.

Everyone of my friends who's parent(s) served and/or made careers have turned out extremely well mannered, disciplined, and respectful.

Plus your boy IS old enough to understand somewhat where Daddy is going, and he'll be back to see him occasionally, and he's doing what's right for his family and country.

 

[Indy_Civic]

That's a tough decision. You want to work a job you love but want to be there for your kid. I've served and guys I know that were in before and after 9/11 say the military has changed. If it was me, I wouldn't want my kid to be a an army brat and move from base to base. Then by the time I get my 20 years in, he would be 21 and I would miss a lot of him growing up. But the decision is ultimately yours. I did read in the paper that extended tours were being phased out.

 

[AutoFanatik]

Ok this is a bit if a different situatiion but kind if similar.

My exs dad was in special forces....he retired and became a chief of police. Well when he retired from the pd. He was approached by a private contractor to go over to afghanistan...his daughters were 17 21 and 22 so no little ones. His motivation for doing taking the
job was that it would allow him to cover all three college tuitions. Any ways...the point of me telling this whole story. Is that his whole extended family....both his and his inlaws thought it was greatly irresponsible. Sorry so long

 

[vjf915]

I think that serving in 97-01 may have been fun for a reason. Looks like you got out JUST at the right time. I have nothing but respect for those in our armed forces though. But it may be time for you to just try and find a better job here. Your son is 5, and still growing.....I think he should be your main focus right now. Without trying to develop a strong relationship.....or any relationship at all, you and your son may not be that close. Thats just my opinion. Do you have any kind of college education?

 

[boosted to 26ps]

no my rank will drop, an since I've been out a while now there debating if I should go back for training, which I hated.

now me an my boy are real close...hes a daddys boy, lol. he's very well mannered, somewhat independent (gets his own breakfast, cleans up after himself, helps with cleaning the house, helps me work on my car..etc). so I know he sees what im doin an wants to do the same, kinda like parenting by example, that's how I see it. but my ex has primary placement of him, so he wouldn't be goin all over hell with me.. that's a plus.

another reason is my great grampsserved as infantry in world war 1, gramps served as a medic in world war 2, my other gramps served as infantry in korean war, an my uncle served in vietnam... now my generation (me an my cousins) nobody but me has followed them.

vj don't get me wrong, I love my boy an he is my main focus. yeah even thought I might not see him alot, he knows an later on in life hell know better why I did it... to provide for him. an also hell see that even thought I might not of been there for him when he needed me, it was all for a specific reason, to support him later on in life...an perhaps hell follow me an pick up more. becoming more responsible, more well mannered an so on

 

[vjf915]

To me, it looks like you have already thought this out to every possible extent, and have made your decision already......whether you know it or not. And for the record, I dont know if you took it like this, but I was not trying to say that you would be abandoning your son by leaving.

 

[Puma]

OP, you stated that the mother is your ex and has primary custody, so it sounds like this won't be too bad of an adjustment to your boy.

Even though she is your ex, she's still the mother of your son......how is she feeling about this matter?
Is the 'relationship' healthy w/ you two?
Does she support you going back in?
Would she cloud your son's mind with "your daddy done ran off to the military b/c he don't wanna be a MAN and raise you, he'd rather yo mamma do it and step in later', bullshit.
Or would she help him understand better that Daddy's doing this for his little man and himself?

 

[vjf915]

Ohhh thats a GOOD point. Wouldnt want that to happen. Your son may understand from HIS perspective, but if he has an outside pressure, it may lead to him believing something else over time.

 

[got traction]

indoc @ 30 years old? Sorry man, you prob wont make it.

 

[boosted to 26ps]

no our relationship is actually better than it was when we were together, but I haven't talked to her bout it yet... but I do think she would be supportive about it

what makes you think that got traction. you think just because im 30, im old an stuff?? I work out every few days... curls, bench, run, etc etc etc. trust me I would have no problem, lol...

 

[Puma]

no our relationship is actually better than it was when we were together, but I haven't talked to her bout it yet... but I do think she would be supportive about it

Well this is obviously a HUGE move in your life that I'd hope you'd discuss w/ her..

 

[boosted to 26ps]

Well this is obviously a HUGE move in your life that I'd hope you'd discuss w/ her..

yeah I've been planning it, she already kinda knows...but just not fully

 

[253eg]

what makes you think that got traction. you think just because im 30, im old an stuff?? I work out every few days... curls, bench, run, etc etc etc. trust me I would have no problem, lol...

You might break a hip, lol. s**t, I think you will prolly be let back in, especially after seeing some of the people they have been letting into the Army.

 

[MR99si]

Yeah, you'll love SF.....


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wpSJZLNFOHs

 

[Wolfy]

From what I've seen, being in the military is the best choice for raising a family in times like these... sure you have deployments, but the support you and your family gets from the military is second to none.

Hell, I'd be staying in if I was married/had a kid!

 

[got traction]

Yeah, you'll love SF.....


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wpSJZLNFOHs

hahah...indoc is pretty intense from what i've seen/heard. Wash out rate is 99% or something like that

 

[Wolfy]

Actually the highest wash out rate for any sort of training like that is for USAF Pararescue... lowest is about 60% and highest is around 90%... one section of that training is underwater egress... it's something that all Marines in an aviation command have to do to be able to fly, a lot of people just plain can't do it, they chicken out or panic as soon as they get flipped upside down underwater

 

[Jeegz]

I dont know Steve. My mom and dad both served in the Marines. Now my mom and and are divorced. Ive seen downside to the military and vote no. I think you should stay stateside and find work here and build a relationship with you son.