Stakeout, capture, detain, get a bunch of tiny razors, hydrogen peroxide, a tub of ice, muffled ear muffs, blacked out goggles, get creative.
My dad stakeout after his EE Wagon was broken into with his friends and he had noticed this silver cavalier kept circling the area every couple of hours. So he got myself, and some friends from work to stakeout in one of those chevy work vans. So my dad "gets home" around 5pm, around the time the cavalier makes it rounds, and he rushes out of his car after parking in the driveway, while acting like something happened inside because he was on his phone. While on the phone and hurrying inside he said, "What?! I'll be right inside and ran inside without locking the door. Mind you, that the rest of us where huddled in this van like it was Ocean's 11, just waiting. And sure enough the cavalier was parked at the corner, but not on the same street; like on the intersection by the stop sign. And then some guy gets out and starts walking toward my dad's car while he is inside, the guy puts on a hood, scopes the area for a bit, checks that my dad is inside and we had him watch a movie in the living room with surround sound; so the thief is like perfect and just opens the door and goes to work. After a minute, I come up and open the door and pull the guy out and my dad's friends come rushing out and we struggle with him to the ground and ziptie his hands and legs, simultaneously calling the cops. We recorded the damage as he was trying to get the center console, glove box, and pods from the back of the wagon. Cops came, arrested him and never had problems again. We ended up asking the cops what happened and he had warrants for grand theft auto but his sentence was lessened because he ratted out his associates so the cops boosted patrols and starting cracking down on the car break in's.
No fat chicks, car will scrape.